- Finding out we were having a girl made the pregnancy feel so much more real. Our baby isn’t a genderless, nameless peanut anymore! We can now picture what our family might look like in a few months and actually buy stuff for her. Give me all the bows and cute baby shoes! Aside from all of the adorable but superficial stuff, we’re really excited to be having a daughter. There’s so much I want to share with her.
- Feeling baby move more frequently. This trimester, I went from feeling baby move every once in a while to feeling her move every day. She’s squiggly and opinionated, and I love it. She likes hanging out on my right side so it makes my belly look deformed, and dislikes any kind of pressure on her.
- Looking more visibly pregnant. I started out this pregnancy with a belly (classic overachiever), so I feel like I didn’t really start showing a baby bump for a while. I loved it when I finally did, and even more so when random people would ask me when I was due, what I was having, etc. I will take any excuse to talk about my baby!
- Not feeling sick as often and liking food again. I was so worried I’d never like food again, and I feel so lucky that my morning sickness didn’t really linger past the first trimester. I haven’t really had that many cravings, but my current favorites are pupusas, fruit smoothies, chocolate chip waffles or pancakes, and ice cream.
- Holy Braxton Hicks, Batman! I’ve been having contractions for the last fifteen weeks or so, and even though my doctor assures me they’re normal, I can’t help but worry whenever they start up. There was a particularly scary Saturday when I was around 24 weeks where it was hot and I was probably not hydrating as much as I should. I started having really consistent contractions, and when I put them into my pregnancy app, a little red banner popped up that said, “You might want to contact your healthcare provider because labor could be on its way.” Visions of a tiny baby being hooked up to machines flashed through my brain as I tried to drink as much water as I could. After calling my doctor, I basically had to tell my baby the same thing the doctor told me, “This isn’t a lecture, but you need to take it easy.” Luckily, with some rest and hydration, the contractions finally stopped, and I’ve been a lot more careful ever since.
- Getting the nursery ready currently feels like a Herculean task because the baby’s room has been acting as our laundry room / storage facility / guest bedroom / office for the last five years. We’re able to progress about five inches per Saturday, so stay tuned for a nursery reveal during fall of 2020.
- My wedding ring has stopped fitting, and I miss it so much! Here’s a picture of us during happier and slimmer times:
- I was no athlete before pregnancy, but I feel like my body is so weak now. I can’t keep our apartment as clean as I would like to, get through an endowment session without needing to go to the bathroom, or even go grocery shopping without having contractions. It can be frustrating to feel like my body just doesn’t listen to me like it used to, especially when all of my maternal instincts want to do is nest.
- My belly button is a thing of the past. I was terrified of having an outie, so my body overcorrected and gave me the deepest innie I’ve ever seen. There used to be a show on ABC Family about an alien who didn’t have a belly button, and that’s how I feel, except he also had a six pack, which I do not have.
On my Brain
- Harry Potter. I’ve been listening to a podcast called “Harry Potter and the Sacred Text” (I highly recommend it if you like Harry Potter!), so that’s probably why this has been on my mind so much. I read the Harry Potter books at the end of middle school / beginning of high school, and I really enjoyed them, but it hasn’t been until the last few years that I’ve really come to love them. The story is so much more complex and beautiful than I ever realized back then, and listening to the podcast has made me love it even more. Some of the themes that it’s discussed that have really stuck with me are how love can be a protective force (Harry being protected from Voldemort by his mom’s love) and what it takes to create a safe space that feels like home (Hogwarts). If we’re ever able to get baby’s nursery put together, I want to incorporate some Harry Potter themes because I want for her to always feel like she’s surrounded by magic. Plus, I love unicorns.
- How to raise a girl who doesn’t hate her body. Ever since I found out we were having a girl, I’ve tried to be more conscious about what I say about my body and other people’s bodies. It can be so easy to criticize a few extra pounds, but I want to emphasize the importance of health over the importance of being a certain shape. I’ve been fat and I’ve been skinny, and I was happy and miserable being both. It’s almost like what you look like on the outside isn’t what actually makes you happy! I want to raise my daughter knowing this. In Why Not Me?, Mindy Kaling said this about being thin:
Even though I wish I could be thin, and that I could have the ease of lifestyle that I associate with being thin, I don’t wish for it with all my heart. Because my heart is reserved for way more important things.
Mine is too! There are so many other things I want to do with my life besides torture it into being a certain shape.
- Nesting. I read Hey Natalie Jean by Natalie Holbrook at the beginning of this trimester, and she said something about decorating a home that really stuck out to me. She said that the way you make your house a home is a love letter to your family. I love that! She also said this:
One afternoon I was out running errands with my dad when the subject of my mother came up. My dad got this faraway look in his eye and said, “Natalie, this is the thing about your mother. Growing up at my house, it never mattered what anything looked like. I had seven brothers. We were always dirty; the house was a constant wreck. I didn’t expect that beauty would ever be part of my life. But then I met your mother. She brought beauty into my life. I didn’t even know it was missing, but because of her, I have it. It’s been so wonderful for a guy like me. She’s made my life beautiful, and I’m so grateful for her.”
And that’s when I knew what I wanted to be when I grew up.
Isn’t that the greatest tribute? Beauty is important, which is why we live in a world that’s beautiful. This pregnancy I’ve felt this yearning towards homemaking become stronger than ever. I want to create a beautiful home for those I love. I’ve learned that in order for my home to feel mine and to feel like a place I want to be, it needs to: smell good, be well lit, have some treats (preferably in a cute glass container), be filled with books, be clean, and have a pop of color and pattern. I’ve realized that it doesn’t take a lot of money, but it does take a lot of intention. That being said, one of my financial goals is to someday own a volcano candle from Anthopologie and a fridge that makes pebble ice.