This post could also be titled: “We’re old.”
At approximately 9 pm on a Friday night, I was in my Snuggie and ready to watch consecutive episodes of “Beautiful People” on Netflix. Tyson had mentioned that he wanted to go to the Homecoming Dance (because there might be food), but I said I was too tired.
At approximately 10 pm, and in the spirit of adventure, I said to Tyson, “Put your shoes on, we’re going to the Homecoming Dance.”
We walked over to the Homecoming Dance, and decided that it was significantly lamer than last year. After looking for food and being unable to find any, we basically walked in one door and out the other. I saw crop tops galore, obscene dancing, and heard language that made me want to yell, “Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?” Have college freshmen always looked so young, or are we just getting older? Also, the smell… You guys, please plug a few hundred Scentsies in.
After leaving, we walked around campus for a little while, and I asked Tyson, “Aren’t you so glad you don’t have to find your soulmate in this mess?”
I know I am.